"waddle, waddle, quack, quack . . . ."

After much thought and deliberation with my self I've decided to share something with you, my friends. Friends being the operative word, here. It takes all my strength and courage to do this, but I can't get this "trauma" off my mind and I think sharing it will help me heal faster.

I was in Wal-Mart (my least favorite place in the world) around Christmastime with Helena and this trauma has prevented me from remembering who else was with me or what I was there for. The following conversation with Helena caused me much humiliation and my mind went reeling and all sense of purpose stopped!
We are walking towards the garden shop and I am holding her hand. All's innocent and all's well - so I thought.
Out of the blue, she looks up at me and asks - "Mom-mom, why are you waddling?" (insert screeching halt here) Not in a "cute" way mind you, but in a way you would ask a child - "Why are you doing that?". My mind immediately conjured up images of the soft, yellow, web-footed thing.
I wasn't quite sure I heard what I heard and thought about not saying anything, lest I should "quack".
But. . . couldn't leave well enough alone - nope, not me.
So I said - "Waddling? Do you even know what that means?" (stupid question #1) "Yes", says she, oh wise one. So I said (should've known better) "Show me, then."
No problem here - she's quite happy to oblige as she holds her arms stiff to her side and proceeds to waddle like a duck! Oh, the horror in my heart! That can't be me, I'm thinking as I am looking around! (is anyone else privy to this conversation?)
Unable to keep quiet, I ask - "How should I walk?" (stupid question #2)
Ah - "Little Miss I have the World Under Control" proceeded to walk like a prim (almost military) and proper little lady. "Like this", she says.

Now, in my defense: I was wearing a bulky coat, holding a slightly heavy purse and the hand of "Little Miss Proper". So I could have (more than likely) been off balance. (That's my story and I'm sticking to it!)